STRUGGLE, PAIN AND DISAPPOINTMENT: THE JOURNEY OF HEALING HAS BEGUN

When the King visited the monasteries of the great Zen master Lin Chi, he was astonished to learn that there were more than ten thousand monks living there with him.

Wanting to know the exact number of monks, the King asked: " How many disciples do you have?"

Lin Chi replied, " Four or five at the very most"

                                                                                                A Buddhist Story

The life journey that we are on, the path that we follow is a struggle. This is the reality that we all have to confront, a reality that even Lin Chi's Zen monks had to face. It's the reality that the Buddha expressed in the first Noble Truth (  the recognition of suffering - Dukkha ) and even after 2,500 years, this Truth still holds despite any ' progress ' that we may have made in our technological, post - modernist world. This is not to deny or minimize the existence of pleasure ( Sukha ) in our lives. We are all very much aware of  the propensity we have for pleasure, the pleasure that we try to pursue with single mindedness and dilligence, the pleasure that we hunt down with ruthless abandon wherever it may lead us. But we have no problems with our encounters with pleasure, it is our exposure to suffering that causes us the problems.

Life is a struggle.....in our engagement with a spiritual path, no matter how far we think we have travelled, there are always difficulties to face. No one is exempt from the vicissitudes of life. Emotional., psychological and physical pain accompanies us wherever we go, there is no escaping from it. Even if we join a monastic order, like Lin Chi's monks, there will be difficulties to overcome, indeed they may very well be intensified under this regime as lives come under the microscope of fuller attention.

Life is a struggle...... We do seem, at times, to have very high thresholds for tolerating pain. Sometimes it is habitual - something that we have learnt and gone along with over a period of time, accepting our position with an air of normality. At other times we can panic at the slightest exposure to pain, sending us in a spin of confusion. Ignoring our ' visitor ' or putting on an armour coat of denial ( something deeper and more troublesome than just ignoring ) are other tactics that we can employ, all making matters far worse for us when dealing with life issues.

Life is a slruggle......buried somewhere deep in our suffering is often a signal indicating that we are clinging to something. This form of attachment, subtle at times, plays a large part in our mental make up and can cause distressing situations, if left unchecked. Our commitment to a

' letting go process ' allows us into a space of healing, a space of spiritual enlargement, where we no longer feel that we have to take on ownership of the pain - take on the exclusive rights to let it dominate our lives.

Healing can only come to a mind that is able to release its built up anxieties and fears, its resentments and illusions, through contact with forgiveness - forgiveness for ourselves and for others.

     " Each moment we enter our pain with a merciful awareness is a moment of   healing.

                   Each moment we touch suffering with love we are healed."

                                                         S Levine

We  need to be healed.....starting on a spiritual path can sometimes be interpreted as an implicit or explicit acknowledgement that we are unwell, that we need to work on ourselves to discover, or recover a more peaceful existence. But all the built up blocks of anger, hate, resentment, or even just indifference need to be attended to in order for us to make this transition.

Healing is a form of integration - the integration of mind and body into the heart. But this is never really easy, as Lin Chi probably recognized, it constantly has to be worked at with commitment and persistence.

We need to be healed..... in my own life I have had to struggle with the pain of a modern malaise, that of over -achieving. A self -induced condition where I thought I would never gain happiness unless I was stretching myself, pushing myself, busying myself with all manner of things that I thought would give me a sense of purpose and identity in the world at large. But in all the work that I undertook, all I ever found was more work to undertake, more projects to pursue, and very little in the way of a lasting, deeper satisfaction or a sense of connectedness to other people. So I decided to take time out to re - assess my life, to see if I could find new ways of being in this world that were more conducive to my health and well - being. I searched for a calmer presence in this world that did not rely on external judgement and praise but instead embraced a reflective quality that led to a deeper understanding and inner acceptance of what was of value to me and what was not. It was pathway to a new life - a spiritual quest to find an healing, and I did come to a profound healing in my discovery of a spiritual path......

We need to be healed.....We march through our lives, and through the valuable time that we have been given, like troops across a vast battlefield. Onwards as if to victory, but victory for what?

The awarding and acceptance of prizes? The certificates and diplomas displayed in the office or on the living room wall? The careers that promise us ' prospects ' and financial rewards? The relationships that promise us devotion and unswerving love? Yet we continue our striving, pushing, our searching out in unrelenting fashion, but are we any further into truth? Any further into a lasting sense of happiness and contentment?

We need to be healed.... Healing is an ongoing process, a constant engagement with listening - listening to our hearts, our minds, our bodies in an attempt to reach a deeper understanding which, if acted upon, brings us back into harmony. Healing is a journey of homecoming, returning to our natural selves. Healing encompasses everything that makes us whole, that takes us onto a journey to wholeness.

We need to be healed.....Because reparation involves us in a positive, integrative process of going forward, involves us in a process of individual growth and empowerment, do we really have a choice to refuse this gift? Healing can come to us but we must be receptive, we must become good hosts for it. Are we? Do we welcome healing in as a friend or are we still resisting it?

  Being cured and being healed are not the same thing. Healing is a much wider concept.

  To ask for healing is to ask to be made whole, that is to say to reach a state of well -

  being in body, mind and spirit, that can triumph over a continuing sickness in one

  aspect of oneself. Being healed is to be set free from limitations so that one can fulfil

  one's potential as a human being in relation to others. We cannot always be cured but

                                                we can always be healed                

                                                                 Una Kroll

The Buddha, in recognizing the existence of suffering concentrated his thoughts on its underlying nature and tried to establish a pragmatic route that we could follow to lead us away from its presence - the Noble Eightfold Path. This embodiment of the Dharma still lies at the very heart of Buddhism, giving it _expression and vitality even today, and it is the same system that the monks at Zen master Lin Chi's monasteries tried to engage with, although Lin Chi himself was not convinced.

The Noble Eightfold Path consists of:

·                     Right Understanding                              ( Samma ditthi )

            ( Looking at the world, as it is, without any illusions )

·                     Right Thought                                       ( Samma sankappa )

            ( Thinking in  a positive, compassionate way )

·                     Right Speech                                        ( Samma vaca )

            ( Speaking in an appropriate manner that avoids hurting anyone )

·                     Right Action                                          ( Samma kammanta )

            ( Behaving in ethical ways )

·                     Right Livelihood                                     ( Samma ajiva )

           ( Engaged with work that contributes to skilful outcomes )

·                     Right Effort                                            ( Samma vayama )

             ( Using our energy in a committed and sustainable way )

·                     Right Mindfulness                                  (  Samma sati )

            ( Being attentive to others and ourselves )

·                     Right Concentration                               ( Samma samadhi )

            ( Applying the mind to positive ends )

When we engage with the Noble Eightfold Path we are able to reflect, meaningfully, on our behaviour and distinguish better ways of conduct that incorporates the needs of others rather than our own narrow needs. It's a move away from a position of  false individualism ( that separates and divides ) to a position of responsible, collective presence that joins and unites.

CONCLUSION

Sometimes it is in the very moments when fear and doubt grips our hearts, when gloom and darkness descends suddenly and quite dramatically upon us, that we realize the need to find a new way of being in our lives. A new way that can avoid unnecessary pain and suffering. But a new life can only begin with us, no one else, we are the ones that decide if a new life is desirable or not, possible or not. So given the nature of our worldly existence, with all its attendant dukkha, what way will you choose?

The Noble Eightfold Path is a living path that we can all tread in order to bring peace, happiness and contentrnent into our lives; but it is a difficult path to follow, because life itself is difficult. However, provided we meet it with an open heart and generous commitment then we will undoubtedly go forward into spiritual progress.

Given the ambiguous, challenging world of samsara it could be argued that Lin Chi's expectations, regarding his monks' spiritual growth, were too high. Perhaps he understated the struggle involved in trying to lead a truly spiritual existence? Perhaps he did not fully realize the the power of ' distractions ' in life that can take us all away from the path? Perhaps he was too judgemental in his approach? Perhaps he should have accepted the notion of individual progress rather than perfection ?

I wonder what the King thought?

I wonder what you think?

HAVE A SAFE AND REWARDING JOURNEY.....

Prostate Cancer as Number One Preventable Health Tragedy?

by Plato Rosinke

Can you believe that prostate cancer is the number one cancer-killer of males in the world?  Can you also believe that there is no universally-agreed upon strategy for its’ diagnosis and management?  There is a lot of talk these days about prostate cancer on the news, yet nobody can seem to figure out what is behind the whole thing.  A recent article actually suggested that masturbation is the solution!  Tired old references to the high incidence of prostate cancer in the clergy are cited.  If you have ever surfed the Internet with your content filter turned off, you will have no doubt that the entire world is doing anything but holding back their seed in pursuit of spiritual ideals.

So what is behind these staggering numbers?  Chinese medical theory would suggest that too much sexual activity is as bad as too little, and common sense in any culture points to the benefits of moderation with respect to any activity.  Plant-based herbal remedies like saw palmetto and pumpkin seeds are purchased in large numbers, but the relief they offer is fleeting at best.  Their temporary benefit, however, points back to a concept in Chinese medicine called “excessive yang.”  In western thought, we would say that something has “overheated.”

Your prostate may indeed be suffering from a fever!  How could this happen?  The answer lies in a substance called DHT, or dihydrotestosterone.  This is a by-product of testosterone metabolization, and perfectly natural.  DHT is what allows you to produce   erections and build muscles.  Ironically, it also leads to an inflamed and enlarged prostate if it continues to accumulate in the prostate gland.  Interestingly, DHT accumulation in the scalp is what accounts for hair loss.  Incidentally, this explains why western drugs that promote hair growth also promote testicular shrinkage.


The truth is that DHT production has been on the rise over the last 30 years. The western world eats a tremendous amount of meat that is filled with hormonal back-wash that has been accumulating in livestock long before they are ever brought to the slaughterhouse.  How else could we "grow" the animals so fast?  Poetically, we also absorb this accumulation of hormones when we eat these "fast-track" animals.  We also ingest sports supplements and energy boosters purchased at our local vitamin shop that are filled with hormone pre-cursors in order to deliver on their claims of more energy and enhanced sexual function. 

This in itself may not be so bad for the prostate if all the excess DHT was actually burned up.  Unfortunately for the prostate, it rarely is.  This is where the problems begin.  As time goes on, the prostate really has no options available to it other than to grow larger and harder.  This brings on a flurry of problems such as premature ejaculation, urinary incontinence, and ultimately impotence.  In this respect the medical establishment has resumed their usual course of inventing harmful surgeries, radioactive seed implants, and side-effect laden drugs.  The bodies keep piling up and survivors are exactly that--often with permanent damage to their sexual organs as a result of their treatment at the hands of the medical establishment.  In the end, a lot of it comes down to money: many chronic wasting diseases such as cancer and AIDS have simple, cheap cures but this doesn’t make anybody any money.  Of course, I am aware that I will be branded a conspiracy theorist at best and an imbecile at worst for making such a statement.  The common belief is that a cure for AIDS would be all over the news should it suddenly be discovered.  People who subscribe to such notions also believe that AIDS "cocktails" are what is keeping industry poster-boy Earvin "Magic" Johnson from kicking the bucket prematurely.

The truth is that there are cheap and effective solutions for most of life's problems.  Mind you, I don't think buying a pair of magnetic rings will make you an immortal, but I do think purchasing an electronic blood cleaner modeled after the one used by the medical industry itself (or is it the other way around) makes for sound experimentation.

Getting back to prostate problems, some people have gone back to traditional prostate massage methods, but the traditional methods are often messy or psychologically as discomforting as a routine prostate exam.  Luckily, there are new herbal remedies being developed by individuals who use their own bodies as laboratories, and these same individuals are developing methods for massaging the prostate that are non-invasive.

With knowledge we are one step away from power, but it is the application of acquired knowledge is where the power really lies.  

Plato Rosinke
www.prostatesecrets.com

My interest in complementary healing methods occurred after a Near Death Experience in 1975 when I was shown the energy element of the human condition. While researching material for this article I discovered at least 150 different forms of "energy healing" used throughout the world. The words "energy healing" is used to describe the means by which internal and external subtle energy is manipulated by a healer using the hands and/or devices such as needles, magnets, sound, colour, crystals etc. to facilitate the body in healing itself. Some of these systems have been used for thousands of years and all, except perhaps acupuncture, have been dismissed by mainstream medicine. In fact most people involved in medicine look upon it with disdain; this is unfortunate and those that do, I find, have done scant research and have little or no knowledge of this healing modality.
A closer look at some of this research reveals what evidence is available. The work of Prof. W. A. Tiller Ph.D. of Stanford University CA. is a leading investigator into subtle energies, (SE) the same energy with which healers work. His definition involves quantum mechanics but he suggests there is clear evidence for the existence of this field which acts or reacts with physical energies such as electromagnetic fields.
New types of energy healing appear on the scene on a regular basis and one of these is Bio Cell Therapy. It is based on the very ancient healing modality of crystals and through five years of research and development it has been brought into the 21st century. It was discovered that by introducing a pulsed low voltage current through silicon dioxide crystals it amplified the crystal's effects on the body's SE system changes occurred positively affecting the body at a sub-cellular level.
Bio Cell Therapy was developed by the President of Therapeutic Sound Specialist Inc. Mr. Ronald Conn after investigating several different formats. Like the writer his life took a sharp turn soon after a Near Death Experience. This was initiated in 1996, June 25th , a day he remembers precisely, when a chain saw kickback severed his throat to within a millimeter of his jugular vein and trachea. He is quite positive this experience opened his mind to a point where he could accept the "synchronicity leads" he was given by the divine. His search led him to the USA and Europe where he met many people involved in different types of healing. Ronald fabricated a number of prototype units named "Radios" because they transmit and receive information through normalizers, (a small container with crushed silicon dioxide crystals and saline solution) and a small microphone. During the research stage used them on over two thousand test cases. From this research he was able to determine where the 17 evaluation points are on the body and where the attachments should be placed to facilitate the body in healing itself.
I asked Ronald to describe as briefly as possible how Bio Cell Therapy with the Radio works and what it does. The system is bases on several different scientific principles including subtle energy and Biophotonics. The body uses an energy communication system; he liked my analogy of fiber optics, to communicate with all the cells within it. The body's communications system includes the acupuncture meridians and the 450 + points, also the seven major chakras all connected to the central Hara or Shushumna column located in the spine. Evidence exists to show the Hara contains details of our original DNA blueprint, the one we were born with before stress, pollution, poor nutrition, medication etc. caused DNA mutations and subsequent physical problems to occur.
Research in the new field of science called Biophotonics show all living cells emit photons, (the sub-atomic particle of light), as a product of their internal chemical reactions. We know a cancer cell can emit up to 14 times the amount of light than a healthy cell. This light carries a certain frequency and by measuring and recording the frequency of a healthy cell any variation of this frequency would indicate a mutation of the DNA on a gene.


organized cell biophoton emission


chaotic cell biophoton emission
The ancient Ayurvedics teach the chakras are energy points emanating from the Hara column and they communicate with various segmented areas of the body. For example the throat chakra appears to be energetically connected to the entire neck area, shoulders and arms. Cells in this segment would be transmitting a higher or lower normal cell frequency through the meridians to the Hara then to the chakra and evaluation points which can then be measured. Now experts will say, "ah, but we know the chakras vibrate at their own individual frequency so this would distort the readings". This is true but we are not measuring the chakras themselves we are measuring data coming through the chakras and evaluation points. During the initial assessment the client holds one of the crystal "normalizers" in their hand and a pulsed current is transmitted from the radio which sends a vibration through the entire body. The microphone is then placed over known healthy cells and the transmission frequency is then adjusted to the zero reference point on the detector meter. Whilst still holding the normalizer the microphone is placed on the evaluation points and any frequency reading deviating from zero will indicate cells communicating through that point are or are not in their optimal state. Cells that are more chaotic than normal, as in cancer or inflammation, will resonate at a higher frequency and show a plus on the meter, whereas cells that are debilitated will resonate at a lower frequency and a minus is indicated. Once the various frequencies in the 17 points are established it is then possible to introduce a remedial frequency via the associated Chakra that will return the adversely affected cells closer to their correct frequency. There are some clear indications this procedure has a remarkable effect. The cells seem to respond by altering their DNA closer to their original energy blueprint. This is not as outlandish as it sounds. A recent article in the Nov. 2001 edition of "Discover" magazine reported some strange and surprising effects when a varying magnetic field was applied to the brains of rats it produced changes in the levels of neurotransmitters and "the expression of genes related to nerve growth in the brain". The researchers at the Medical University of South Carolina are still trying to figure out how the technique works and why these changes occur.
It should be pointed out here this system does not, nor does it need to, refer to the medical condition of the body. It can never be used as a medical diagnostic tool because it only measures frequency data from certain segments of the body which can include several organs or structures. The measurements are of the condition of the body's energy system. It very often does, however, show an anomalous reading that can be related to a medical condition. Bio Cell Therapy can also be used to facilitate the body to heal itself on a given ailment diagnosed by a medical doctor by applying a normalizer to the affected site.
Once the various anomalous readings have been established it is then necessary to encourage these cells to return to their normal levels. This is accomplished by feeding a lower frequency to a higher than normal reading and vice versa, through the relevant evaluation point using the crystal normalizer. It is believed this remedial frequency will return the cell frequency to normal and in doing so the DNA within these cells appears to be able to repair themselves. This process is relatively unknown to science but as indicated before has been observed by some researchers. It seems cells have an innate knowledge of their healthy condition and have the ability to accept the remedial frequency and reject all others. For this reason the system is totally non-invasive and harmless.
Bio Cell Therapy has been tested on many clients over a period of several years and the results certainly suggest it is implicated in the improvement of many detrimental conditions and is helping people to heal themselves. A compelling case history describes a young man in his late teens who had been suffering from epilepsy for 10 years and was taking $700.00 of medication a month to relieve the debilitating seizures. After a few sessions he noticed an improvement and now after about a year he has reduced medication by 80% and is seizure free. An elderly client had chronic arthritis and had been unable to get up or dress herself and required a walker to move around. After six sessions she can now get up, dress herself, walk up stairs and no longer uses the walker. She was taking no different medication and believes it was the Bio Cell Therapy that helped her. A young woman who was retired from the armed forces as a result of a spine injury about five years ago has been in severe pain ever since. She had one session and almost immediately the pain subsided, the relief so overwhelmed her she cried. This lady believes the therapy may well allow her to avoid surgery on her spine.
When asked about how many people Bio Cell Therapy has helped Mr. Conn stated every person who has used the system has improved or been helped in some manner. That is an amazing record.
Bio Cell Therapy is the trademark of Therapeutic Sound Specialists Inc. who operate an international college to train therapists to operate the Bio Cell Radio. A major portion of the course is Anatomy and Physiology mainly because operators need to know, for example, the location of the pancreas to help someone with diabetes. This part of the course is taught by Sunthuri Bangaar, M.D. who trained in South Africa for 12 years. I asked DR. Bangaar if she believed this system has a scientific basis that may explain the success this system seems to enjoy. Dr. Bangaar stated the relatively new field of Biophotonics, which Bio Cell Therapy uses, certainly has a well-established scientific acceptance. In fact biophoton radiation was discovered in 1923 by a Russian physicist named Alexander Gervitch who at that time called it mitogenetic radiation. The Bio Cell Radio is able to measure and affect these emissions and positive results clearly indicate a direct correlation between the condition of the cell and biophoto emission. What is so new is the ability to manipulate the biophoton emissions thereby apparently returning the cells DNA to or near to its original sequencing.
Many other forms of energy therapy exist, and an increasing number of people use them. One can only conclude there must be something in these systems people believe will help them based on their own experience. It seems we are developing a new paradigm when it comes to our own health. Medical students are being taught the mind-body connection where the state of mind affects the body. Therapeutic or Healing Touch is being taught in training hospitals and used by many nurses which at the very least will relax patients who often require less medication and heal faster. Visualization using positive thought and intent is being used to fight disease. All these were almost unheard of 20 years ago. Could it be the materialistic, empirical scientific barriers are being broken down? These complementary systems are not intended to replace modern medical practice. None to my knowledge can reset a broken bone or sew up a gaping wound. Just imagine the advantages if both modern medicine and complementary therapy were used together.
Skeptics will need to ask themselves why and how the Bio Cell Radio readings and physical symptoms are changing after only one or two sessions. If this system is able to help in reducing pain, and other symptoms it seems likely it could reduce not only the amount of medications needed but the length of time they are administered. It is clear more research is warranted and required. The remaining hurdle is persuading those holding the purse strings to open the purse sufficiently to pay for it and that the results are well worth the expense.

For further details Subtle Energy Systems Inc. at 604 543-7446
Bio: Chris Lovelidge had a Near Death Experience in 1975, it frightened the life out of him. He recovered fully and realized he had glimpsed another reality, this had the effect of opening his mind, like the proverbial "barn door". Since then Chris has been researching all things spiritual including the human subtle energy fields and the effects of energy healing on it. He is presently working on a research project that will reveal this energy field in great detail. With it he will be able to determine directly the relationship between the state of the field and the physical condition of the body. Bringing energy healing into the 21st century.
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The Role of Alternative Medicine in Healthcare
(c) 2001, By Petrea Dishman
Affordable Health & Benefits, LLC
http://www.affordable-health.com

Alternative Medicine (AM) is redefining the boundaries of
individual health and well being. If you have not reviewed your
healthcare policy recently, you might be surprised to discover
that you and your family are now living in the dark ages
regarding treatment options and delivery methods of alternative
care in the field of health. Such alternatives, if covered by
your policy, offer a broader vision than "managed care" alone
ever could, may well reduce your overall cost of healthcare in
general and even improve the future quality of life that you and
your family will enjoy in the years to come.

The epiphany that the definition of health should be, and can be,
far better than simply, free from injury or disease, represents
a paradigm shift in the consciousness of both the consumer as
well as the healthcare provider. It is this realization that is
allowing Alternative Medicine to not only enter mainstream modern
medicine, but also to partner with Conventional Medicine in a new
and profound way, that as one of many successful avenues of
treatment available to today's consumer of health. So, what
happened? What is the role of Alternative Medicine in the lives
of the average consumer and how did this new kid on the
healthcare block rise to such a prominent position in what used
to be a near-sacred and very closed system of Western biomedical
medicine? How is it that would-be charlatans and so-called snake
oil vendors have been allowed to enter the coveted community of
medicine and licensed healthcare professionals? While the answer
to this has many healthcare pundits scratching their heads and
bent over in heated debates regarding the future of managed
care, AM is busy carving a new definition of what it means to be
healthy in today's fast-paced, stress-filled environment and
offering a whole new realm of options for today's consumer to
choose from in the process. Ten years ago, there were no "real,
or rather "recognized, alternatives to the great science of
biomedical medicine, at least not in the West. This is not to
say that alternatives did not exist, quite the contrary.
However, allopathic (conventional) medicine was the only serious
game in town and healthcare consumers were constantly at the
mercy of the managed care "system that this created. At its
inception, managed care was, and still is to some degree, an
attempt to curb the rising costs of healthcare. It is
unfortunate that much of this system has translated into
healthcare that is administered by an external group that
increasingly leaves out both the patient and their doctor from
the decisions regarding individual healthcare options. To the
credit of managed care, there is much underway to correct this
unfortunate turn of events. But hey, what else was there?
If you were a practitioner that specialized in acupuncture,
chiropractic care, homeopathy, or any of a host of other
alternative medicine practices, you were likely seen by the
medical community as little more than a "faith healer and often
as a danger to the healthcare consumer as well. One only turned
to such options if and when conventional methods failed
miserably, and even then only as a sort of last resort, like a
"Hail Mary pass in football, to cure some dreaded disease or
ailment that was generally too far along for any method to
achieve measurable success. The occasional recovery, therefore,
was generally deemed a "medical miracle, or the less grandiose,
"fluke of medicine and seldom given much attention by "real
doctors. On the other hand, the consumer was intrigued and even
began to test the waters to see if some of the alternatives
could answer their CM failures. Dissatisfaction with the
managed care system of the past decade, coupled with one
important event and a slight shift in thinking created the
perfect conditions for Alternative Medicine to flourish.
The latter two happened almost simultaneously and served as
the catalyst in redefining the playing field within the health-
care profession. Their role in the rapid restructuring of
provider care, as well as the expansion of accepted methods of
healthcare and delivery have forever altered
the face of medicine. Now, these two systems are bound together
and each will find their respective role in the consumer
healthcare market.

First, the cost of healthcare skyrocketed. Rising costs for
diagnostic and treatment of injury and disease fueled an
inevitable shift in focus, primarily from treatment to
prevention, and this created the perfect niche that would soon
be filled by the proactive stance that AM's prevention provides.
Second, with the Information Age in full swing, access to
quality information from a variety of sources translated into
patients being better informed of healthcare issues and
therefore more involved in their treatment options, if for no
other reason than as a means to reduce their overall healthcare
costs. This rise in awareness assisted in the descent of doctors
from their pedestals and the rise of the consumer from his weary
knees. Simply put, when costs rise people begin asking questions
and seeking alternatives.
There are considerable drawbacks to both conventional and
alternative medicine. So, why does it appear that these two
methods of delivery are at opposite ends of the healthcare
spectrum? Primarily, because they are seen to be diametrically
opposed in their focus, their treatment philosophy and even
their point of entry into and the duration of their presence in
the healthcare process of the patients they encounter.

Dissecting these differences aid not only in distinguishing the
role of Alternative Medicine today, but also in highlighting the
importance of both as "partners in the ongoing battle of
personal health and well-being. Conventional (allopathic)
Medicine (CM) hinges on "the diagnosis of a patient's condition.
This focus on "fixing a problem means that allopathic medicine
enters the healthcare process AFTER the patient has been injured
or AFTER an ailment or disease has progressed to the level where
an accurate diagnosis can be made. Once made, the diagnosis
dictates both the treatment, accomplished via drug therapy
and/or surgery, and the cost. CM is therefore both invasive and
temporary, meaning that once the malady has been identified,
fixed, cured, or removed, CM exits the healthcare process.
Contrast this to Alternative Medicine, which is focused on
"preventing a problem, meaning that AM by its very nature
attempts, and prefers, to enter the healthcare process BEFORE
the patient is injured or becomes ill. Prevention is the first
line of defense. When this frontline is penetrated by injury or
disease, AM makes every attempt to "assist the body in healing
itself, via natural means, whenever and wherever possible.
Alternative Medicine is thus non-invasive, even passive and more
long-term, meaning that it becomes part of a consumer's
healthcare regime and does not so quickly exit the health
process, if at all. Whether or not this will translate into
lower costs for wellness over the lifespan of an individual
remains to be seen. "An ounce of prevention is worth a pound
of cure, and at no other time has this statement been more true,
especially if the cure requires an expensive antibiotic, surgery
and/or or an extended, or even brief, hospital stay. Nutrition
and lifestyle changes alone can easily reduce the incidence of
costly injury and disease. The day is quickly approaching when
AM will be the primary method of healthcare delivery and CM will
enter the process only where AM fails, which is a complete
reversal of where healthcare was only a decade ago. It is
interesting that AM is actually distinguishing itself by
redefining the role of Conventional Medicine in healthcare.
Where does this leave us? The healthcare consumer of tomorrow is
expected to be both well informed and totally involved in the
decisions surrounding their personal health and well being. Not
limited to local or even national healthcare options, the
patient of this next century will enjoy global access to both
information and treatment options. Healthcare policies are
already positioning themselves for this global marketplace and
are embracing AM as a means of lowering their own liability and
costs as well as expanding their consumer pool. This shift is
already changing the playing field for providers of healthcare
coverage and it should serve as a heads up to all of us to make
sure our policies reflect these changing attitudes and include a
much broader spectrum of healthcare options.

What is the quality of your health worth? Today's "non-
traditional healthcare plans are the cornerstone of holistic
health and the mainstay of the future quality of life that you
and your family will enjoy in the years to come. Make sure your
policy answers this question to the greatest satisfaction for
you and your family.

RESOURCE BOX:

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benefits such as Alternative Medicine, Dental, Medical, Vision,
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info: 800-600-7819 or http://www.affordable-health.com/?gal
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Title: Opposites Attract, they Don't Last!


Why are we attracted to certain people and yet others we feel re-
pelled by? Is it really looks? Is it behavior? Is it some deep
dark unconscious set of beliefs that reverberate out of us?
This author believes it's the latter - that we are each project-
ing our needs into the world, and when our opposite comes within
range, the snare is laid: attraction.


In this article you will follow one set of attraction types, of
many, through its course so that you can see how this concept
plays itself out. Then you can judge for yourself if you believe
that people are attractive to you because of what they look like
or because of what they need, what you have to offer, what you
need, and what they have to offer you.

To begin, terms need to be defined. The first is the "dominant
operating style" of a person. Most probably all of you have
heard of the "controller" type of person, or the rescuer, the
pleaser and so on. There are actually 7 types of operating
styles. They are, beginning with the strongest and most over-
whelming type of style to the weakest, or the most under-whelm-
ing type.

Self-Exalted
Controller
Rescuer
Martyr
Pleaser
Doormat
Inferior

Each style was created as a result of a "family of origin
situation." This style, developed earlier in life, is still
being used currently to operate because there's a pay-off for
doing so. We will examine the "controller" type and the
"pleaser" types in this article then, demonstrating the at-
traction they have and why. The language used in the descrip-
tions is to stimulate feelings so don't be surprised if you
feel emotionally charged - that is expected. If it has no
effect on you, then there is a high likelihood that you are
neither a controller type nor a pleaser type. Types attract
their opposite to create balance. That is the key to attrac-
tion. A powerful person is usually NOT attracted to another
powerful person, even though ideally, if you were to ask a
powerful person who their ideal mate would be, they would claim
it to be another powerful person. But in fact, they are most
attracted to an equally weak person, in the magnitude of their
strength, only tilted the other way. Likewise, the weaker
person will be attracted to an equally strong person. When
using terms like "weak" or "strong," it doesn't mean a person
is necessary physically, mentally or emotionally so, it's in
their "presentation," willingness to go after what they want,
or the tenacity for which they stand up Self. This desire to
strike a balance is really an impulse to belong - the so-called
"pecking" order established early in life. The stronger gains
their "place of belonging" from being NEEDED for protection,
and the weak gains their "place of belonging" by being desirable
enough to be protected.

We will now cover the two types in more detail: The controller
is driven to make sure that everything is going correctly,
according to plan - their plan. They will go to great lengths
to make sure that no one slips up by telling them exactly how
to do it, standing over them to make sure it's done "right."

These types are developed as a result of a laid back environment
in childhood where nothing really gets accomplished or people get
hurt, because no one is taking care of business. They also grow
out of a need to strengthen a family unit where mother and father
are bent towards making everyone happy but themselves. So it is
the controller that finds their place at the head of the family.
The controller types are the managers of our society who get
things done, are guardians of the weak, and the long-range
planners in our midst.

Pitfalls for controllers are that they are often viewed as
stubborn and unmovable. They find it difficult to work in
anything other than a hierarchal system, with them being at the
top. They often don't let others make their own decisions and
think that this kind of behavior is welcomed. These types are
threatened by individual thinkers who don't stop to include
them in their decisions and therefore would find first-movers,
or self-starters, repelling.

Therefore, love for them is often a one-sided relationship, with
them on top and the other beneath. Pleaser or doormat types
are most frequently chosen as partners as they are other-oriented
and fall deep into the trap of the controller by putting themselves
at the center of the controller's life. In this article we'll cover
the pleaser operating style to demonstrate the attraction.

Self-esteem for the controller is derived from their ability to
control their environment and the people in it. The more they can
do it, the greater value they believe they have.

Always being in control seems to have its benefits. But the down-
side is that it causes a person to become exhausted as they carry
the weight of their world on their shoulders. It seems that every-
one depends on this person. And in doing so much for others then,
the pattern deepens because then people expect you to just take
care of everything. Now, let's look at how the attraction to the
"opposite" comes into play.

The opposite personality to which the controller is attracted to
is the person who prefers to have someone else make their decisions
for them.

This operating style, positive in nature, is just what it says; it
likes to make everyone happy all of the time. They derive great
pleasure in the pleasure that others experience, most often fore-
going their own.

The pleaser is developed in a family that is very controlled and
they have, as a result, adopted and are attracted to a controlling
environment and anyone who can deliver it. They learn early that
it's better to go along and get along than to make waves. They are
termed as "nice" when they behave the way the controlling-type
person wants them to behave. By adulthood, the "nice" one is
completely oblivious to the fact that they have long ago given
up their life to those in control. It takes great commitment to
recognize this drive to please (let alone change it), because
to the Pleaser, to be anything different is to be mean and con-
trolling. The Pleaser type is drawn to controller types throughout
their life because it is their family-of-origin experience.
It is comfortable. Without the control, they don't know how to
survive. They keep on pleasing, hoping that someday, someone will
please them. The key to isolating whether or not you are a pleaser
type is to ask yourself "do I do too much for others and find myself
feeling disappointed?"

Love for the pleaser is fleeting because no matter what they do,
it seems that it is never enough. So, in their relationships,
love goes as their ability to please their partner goes.

Self-esteem also follows this pattern for them. If they get "A"
marks for being the "nicest" person, then they feel great about
themselves. If not, they don't.

Now that the two opposites have been described, can you see how
they fit together like a glove - actually STUCK in a dance that
keeps them frozen in their original "unconsciously agreed upon
relationship." The pleaser NEEDS someone to decide how things
should be, and not only lets their controlling partner decide,
but begs them to. And the Controlling partner just loves their
pleasing partner because their authority will never be challenged.
From an observer's point of view, it looks perfect - balanced by
each filling each other's weaknesses. Yes, the controller has
a weakness too, even though it isn't obvious. Their weakness is
to misuse their power and not ever be aware of it - even abuse it
and others around them in subtle or direct ways. This relation-
ship, in the beginning will work, but once the newness wares off,
the attraction that was once there will turn to bitterness and fight-
ing. You see, the original attraction of how perfect that
person was, will actually become the very thing you hate in that
person - it's because that person is showing you your own lack.
And your anger and resentment doesn't come from your partner's
behavior but from your own inner challenge of not being what
that other person is. This person came into your life to teach
you what you need to learn about the love you want to have for
yourself. It will feel 100% like it's the other person, but in
fact it is you. So what do you do? Agree that each of you
needs to change and become more like each other - the controller
type letting go and the pleaser type taking charge. And if you
have lost a relationship like this, next time you feel attracted
to someone, be sure to take a good hard, long look at that person
and what you admire so much about them. If it's because they act
so confident, or look so sexy or so whatever, then it behooves
you to look deep in yourself about what you are lacking, build
it up first, before falling for what you see in someone else.
Fall in love with yourself first and then look for someone just
like you, not your opposite - because opposites attract, they
don't last!

Empathology helps people DO LESS by BEING MORE. If you would like to
learn how this powerful and proven process can help you in every area
of your life - go to: http://empathology.com and pick up your FREE
eBook and sign up for your FREE ezine: All About Healing.


Have A GREAT Day!

Bernie Day
Empathology, Inc.
Seattle, WA
425 488 0546
--Empathology Certification Programs--
FREE eZine: All About Healing
http://empathology.com
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GRIEF WORK TRANSFORMATION


By Jan Maizler
Loss is an experience that affects us all at various times during
our lives. Our society tends to deal with loss the same way it
deals with death and dying - as a painful event to get over
rather than as a natural process that can cause growth and
transformation.
Every loss leaves us with an emptiness - an opening inside.
This opening provides a doorway through which we can
move forward and begin the journey to the rest of our lives.
That journey, and the effort we make to step through that
doorway, are called grief work.
What is loss?
Loss is the process of suffering we go through when we
lose something that we value in our lives.
Loss is inevitable and universal - no matter how hard we
try to avoid it, we will all experience loss at some time.
Nothing is permanent.
Loss is subjective - each person experiences loss in his or
her unique way. We all experience certain kinds of loss,
but the way in which we process it differs tremendously.
What is grief?
The normal human emotional reaction to a significant
loss is grief. It is also known as mourning or bereavement.
Although sadness is the most common symptom, there
are many others such as crying, anger, anxiety,
hopelessness, and emptiness to name a few.
All types of loss carry a certain amount of grief. The
way we grieve is often different for different types of
losses. In order to fully understand grief, it is
important to be aware of the different types of loss
we experience which can help the healing process.
One type of loss, abnormal (unexpected) losses
give us little time for emotional preparation, re-
arrangement or integration. They challenge us to
adjust quickly. Abnormal losses may be acute or chronic. A
diagnosis of Alzheimer's Disease is unexpected, yet is a
chronic loss that may provide years of gradual decline for
the patient and loved ones to adjust to. The sudden death
of a previously healthy loved one is an acute unexpected
loss.
What is grief work?
Grief work is the mental, emotional, and spiritual work of the
grieving process. How you do your grief work determines
whether growth and healing can occur. Grief work trans-
formation is the process that transforms us from the suffering
victim of loss to the more complete person we can eventua-
ly become.
Grief work will proceed on its own accord and momentum
and will only require time, provided nothing interferes with
the process.
The Four Steps of Grief Work Transformation:
Recollection - the first step is the active remembrance to
that which is being lost or has been lost. This may be
accompanied by longing for the pleasures recollected
before the loss occurs.
Review - The second step is to review the loss from your
current perspective and see the impact and effect it has
had on your current life. Then try to speculate about the
future implications of the loss.
Realization - The third step, realization, is the result of
the experience gained through the recollection and the
array of feelings and ideas derived from the review. The
realization comes from recognizing what parts of the loss
are permanent and can not be negotiated back, and
what parts of the loss have opened new possibilities
for the future.
Resolution - this is the final conscious step of grief work
transformation. It is when we resolve to live life acknow-
ledging the loss. We accept the loss and try to learn from
it. Resolution is firmer when it permeates our feelings and
ideas and changes our behavior.
The life cycle entails an ongoing series of coming to-
gether and letting go through loss, bereavement, and
reinvolvement. Grief work is the part of that cycle that
allows us to move past the loss and bereavement and
prepare ourselves for reinvolvement. It allows us to step
into the holes in our lives and fill them up with new growth.

This is an excerpt from "The Transformation Handbook" written by Jan Maizler, MSW, LCSW, a psychotherapist in private practice in Miami, FL. For more of the book go to www.transformationhandbook.com.

Jan Maizler, MSW, LCSW is a psychotherapist in private practice in Miami, FL for the past 25 years. He has written and published numerous articles on the topics of loss and self-improvement. For more information on his latest book "The Transformation Handbook" go to www.transformationhandbook.com.
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